Hey, guys! I can’t believe that 2019 is more than half way through, even if only by two weeks. I’ve been meaning to write this blog for a week now, and not surprisingly, it’s at 2am while I’m strung out and tired that I’m getting the chance.
If nothing else, I’ve prided myself on being real and transparent with you guys, and as far as transparency goes, my official life update for midway 2019 is that life is kicking my ass, but in a good (ish) way. Confused? Okay, let me try to make a little more sense.
My last “official” life update was March 2018. That’s a seventeen month gap if you don’t consider the spot blogs on Sio and a few others. Well, in the land of new parenthood, seventeen months is damn near an eternity, but, I digress.
Peak One – FAMILY
They really should have a better list of things to tell new moms, you know. Such as the fact that being a mom to ‘an infant vs a walking non-talking toddler vs one with a full set of pipes and ever evolving brand spanking new vocabulary’ are not the same! Often times, my house sounds like a war zone, and shamelessly I have partaken in a screaming match or two. (Judge if you must). Defiance and clumsy independence are the order of the day. My kid has whole ass opinions on what she would prefer not to do, bull -type bucks and hollers if she feels embarrassed or like she’s no being allowed the freedom to change her mind after refusing to hug, kiss or cuddle.
“She sure is full of attitude for someone who can’t wipe their own butt!”
She has whole explanations for things, even if half of it is still gibberish with an actual word or two thrown in. And since Boobles and are advanced ‘Sio speakers’ (please note, not even we, the parents are fluent), we usually more or less get the point. If we don’t, we pretend to anyway. Hey, C’est la vie. Let’s not even mention the initial refusal when something is offered and the hollering fit that follows if you accept her refusal. All too often I imagine her thought process to go something like this;
“Don’t you know no means yes, and you need to pretend to take it away so I can holler and dramatically change my mind? Except when it doesn’t and I really don’t want it but if that’s the case I’ll pretend I do, then dramatically wonder why you aren’t getting this! Are you dumb, Mommy?
So, do you guys remember how excited I was when she had started using the potty? Well, that was an epic fail. After our first family trip abroad last year for two weeks with no potty around, that was it. She wasn’t having any of it when we got back home. It didn’t help that I seemed to traumatize her (apparently) by using the potty seat on the actual toilet too soon. So that was a bust.
Up to a few months ago, despite realizing she was definitely controlling her bladder and bowels, she was still wearing diapers. I dreaded the actual potty training and constantly put it off, deciding she is so advanced in other areas there’s no need to rush her. All the while, I grew frustrated with the pooey diapers and fully planned on shipping her off to my mother-in-law to have her trained.
Nevertheless, I put her on the potty a couple of times a day and put her in panties. After a couple of days and tears from us both, she walked up to me, said she wanted to pee-pee. Surprised, I put her on and that was that was that. A few days later, the poop followed. And promptly two weeks after starting to ask to use the potty exclusively (at least during daytime), she refused to use the potty anymore and demanded to sit on the big people throne. Man! I’ve never cheered so much over actual shit in all my life. I cheered for weeks, knowing she loved the praise and would be encouraged to continue.
So, yea! My rockstar is potty trained!
Hubby and I decided to take on homeschooling. It’s not exceedingly common in Jamaica, plus, I don’t think it is recognized’ homeschooling since school is technically not mandatory until the primary level, though for most of us, early childhood education as part of the formal school system was/integral to our culture. Nevertheless, Boobles and I decided that is the route we would like to take. It’s structured, with a curriculum we’re comfortable with, and while she’s started to get used to the concept, at the start of the academic year is when we’ll really start.
Not much has changed over the past year in this regard, except that once again, alone time is… scarce. We’ve been able to steal a couple of hours, weekends (even a week once) here and there but nothing too crazy. One thing that’s definitely been a lifeline for me though, is our marriage journal. Once a month, we penn our thoughts to each other, in reflection of the past month and thoughts/feelings. I find its a great way to remain connected and intimate during the chaos, even if it’s hard to sneak that time in physically.
He’s in final year now, officially and the craziness has already started in some aspects. In others, I know we haven’t seen anything yet! Just imagine the chaos.
This summer we’ve been married four and a half years and been together for eight, and I love this man. He is my anchor and calm throughout storms, and if it’s possible, I still fall for him daily. Ladies, it’s the little things. The love that grows with quiet strength and security, unwavering and you know what it is to feel safe. 😍
Okay, y’all are probably sick of me, lol.
PEAK TWO – PERSONAL GROWTH
Oh, lawd. Where do I begin. The last seventeen months have seen me do some pretty amazing things as far as me growing as a person. In just a few weeks, I’ll be thirty, and while most of the growth I’ve experienced may be too personal to share, some of the more obvious ones are that I authored both my debut novel and a business plan pocket guide. This has shocked me to say the least. Finding out that I had two books in me is still kind of blowing my mind a little. Not to mention the fact that I will be releasing a third in just a few weeks.
The entrepreneurial parts of me have also taken flight too, and with that I have decided to focus on my personal branding. Part of which includes renewing my investment in my blog. Much of my personal brand is centered her, in being a woman wearing many hats in a typical day.
PEAK THREE – ENTREPRENEURSHIP
This year, my writing business has evolved to include communications and my firm Write Lead Digital Partners. It’s still brand new and yet to have an ‘official’ launch, but you see where I am going with this. We currently have a launch project, a social awareness campaign in the works, and I’m super excited to share that with you guys when the time is right.
As you can tell, mostly, things have changed but remained the same, and I am thoroughly enjoying the journey and focusing and centring my life and mindset on being grateful. What have you guys been up to these last few months?
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parentingpassage.com4 years ago
Congratulations on successful potty training :).
Shandean R4 years ago
Thank you! 🙂
Rochelle | Adventuresfromelle4 years ago
You go Shan!!!
Shandean R4 years ago
Thanks hun! ☺️
joannereedauthor4 years ago
Real cutie, and some real rock star attitude.
Shandean R4 years ago
Thanks Joanne! She sure is!🙏🏽